How Are Mothers Able to Do It All? (Hint: We don't.)

Let us get right to the point: How do mothers manage to do it all?

We don't, is the response. Not at all. Not all at once. Not without assistance, either.

However, we can improve our performance in the most important areas. We may simplify our mental to-do lists, reinterpret what "doing it all" means, and create a life that seems more like a rhythm than a treadmill.

Here's how you do it—with frank counsel, tried-and-true tactics, and a little assistance from the actual MVPs (ahem, curbside pickup and robot vacuums).

1. Reduce Cognitive Stress (i.e., Quit Thinking About Dinner Every Day)

The hamster loop of "what is for dinner?" is genuine and draining. Try meal planning before the start of the week, or at least batch planning a few favorite dinners, rather than rushing at 5 p.m. and settling for cereal (again).

I created a free guide to assist: 30 Simple Recipes for Family-Friendly Dinners. These are not gourmet experiments; these are meals you can prepare after work without crying into your cutting board and that your kids will eat.

2. Get Quality Childcare, Not a Band-Aid

We may not talk about this enough, but attempting to balance job and parenting full-time at the same time is a surefire way to end up burned out. as well as guilt. And silent bitterness.

Dependable daycare is a necessity for working mothers, not a luxury. Yes, the cost is high. But what does it get you in terms of brain clarity, relationship preservation, and fundamental human sanity? Worth it.

Invest in the help you require, whether it be an au pair, daycare, or a part-time nanny. In order to prevent the first week from feeling like a chaotic crash course, I have created a free, completely editable Nanny Onboarding Guide to help you lay down your expectations, routines, and preferences if you decide to bring someone into your house.

3. Use the 3-3-3 Method to Take Control of Your Day

Managing everyone's schedules? Greetings from the club. The 3-3-3 method is a deceptively straightforward planning technique that helps you stop chasing your tail and start focusing on what really counts, which is why I really believe in it.

This is how it operates:

Spend three hours on your most crucial deep-focus assignment.

Three tiny projects that you have been putting off

Three essential life-maintenance duties (think: laundry, emails, and making dentist appointments)

Whether it is a digital planner or something elegant and tactile like the Full Focus Planner (a favorite of mine and many of my podcast guests), write it down.

4. Make sleep a top priority, as if your sanity depended on it.

Listen, I understand the want to "just stay up a little later" in order to do some cleaning, respond to emails, or watch a single Love Is Blind episode. Your capacity to be present, be patient, and be productive all suffer when you approach sleep as an optional upgrade.

Try to get at least seven hours, and if that seems unachievable? Now is the time to assign. Employ a housekeeper. Seek assistance with laundry. Wherever possible, outsource. One of the most effective things you can do is to safeguard your sleep.

5. Paying for Peace Does not Mean You are Lazy

You can actually buy back time sometimes. Whether it is a food delivery service, a robot vacuum that cleans while you work, or just a great coffee subscription, it is okay to spend a little money 

Additionally, keep in mind that "doing it all" does not imply working alone.

The seventh circle of motherhood is mentally planning meals while dragging grumpy children through the cereal aisle. Do not do it. Use the grocery pickup; it is a gift. Like the time-saving pro you are, plan your meals on Sunday, create your shopping list, click your basket, and stop by after work.

Get my 30 Simple Family Dinners to help ease your dinnertime stress if you are still lacking ideas.

Conclusion: You Were Not Designed to Do Everything

There is no truth to the notion of the "effortlessly flawless mom." Systems are created by real mothers. They seek assistance. They put sleep first and emphasize what is important over what looks good on Instagram.

You do not have to complete everything.All you need to do is what really counts, with a little breathing room and intention.