Why We are Done Faking It: The Issue With Perfect Mom Influencers She is back.
There is not a single dirty dish in sight at the influencer mom's sun-drenched kitchen, with the kids wearing matching linen overalls and the fresh bread cooling on the counter. Her houseplants are flourishing, her post-C-section abs are in shape, and her child is grinning rather than yelling? Back, apparently.
And if you are like me, you are wearing yesterday's leggings, carrying a half-eaten granola bar, and wondering if your three-day-old dry shampoo is accomplishing anything at all as you browse through her page.
The fact is, we are sick of being flawless.
We have had enough of acting. The comparison is complete. I am done trying to achieve an aesthetic that is not true to life.
Because the messy, chaotic, genuine mother that lies behind every well chosen portrait is the one we need more of.
1. Being perfect is a performance, and it takes a lot of energy.
To be clear, sharing the wonderful moments of parenthood is perfectly acceptable. Everyone does it. However, the message is loud and clear when every post is filtered, every caption is polished, and every mess is hidden:
You ought to be in control. Always.
But actual motherhood? Tears in the Target parking lot, mismatched socks, and intense love entangled in much more tiredness are all part of it. While real mothers are doing incredible things every single day, the performance of perfection makes them feel like they are falling short.
2. We Begin Comparing Yourself to a Falsehood
Comparing is in our nature, but social media makes it even more prevalent.
You feel bad about serving frozen nuggets (again) after you witness another mother preparing organic bento boxes. You start tugging at your postpartum jeans after seeing someone else's "bounce back" post. However, the assistance behind the camera is hidden from view. The nannies. the editing. the sobbing that takes place behind closed doors.
3. Our mental health is suffering as a result of the pressure.
In addition to making us feel insecure, this quest for flawless motherhood can cause anxiety, exhaustion, and loneliness.
We are less inclined to speak up when we believe that we are the only ones going through difficulties. While everyone else seems to have it figured out, we suffer in silence. We pretend to smile. We conceal the overwhelm. And we remain stuck because of that distance.
Asking for assistance gets more difficult the more we normalize only the highlights.
4. Authenticity Is Revolutionary, Not Messy
What we are desiring is this:
posts with pictures of the food and dinner.
"Today was horrible," with no adorable bright side, is what the captions say.
Tales that do not stop the tears and tantrums.
Because when one mother speaks her own, unvarnished truth, it encourages others to follow suit.
Connections are forged through authenticity. Not flawless.
5. We Are Human Beings, Not Just Mothers
We are not only our habits, our go-to snacks, or our nursery décor. As we raise little creatures who rely on us for everything, we are juggling identity changes, body image changes, career pressure, emotional labor, and generational expectations.
That is not beautiful. That truly is a superpower.
Furthermore, a filter is not required.
Last Word: We are Done Faking It We are not bidding farewell to lovely pictures or happy memories. The compulsion to act like someone we are not is going to be gone. to act.
Real life has emerged as the new trend.
On the floor are crumbs. Storytelling stretch marks. Toddlers screaming and real laughter.
The chaos and magic of motherhood.Here's to the mothers who are ready to share what is truly happening behind the scenes and are tired of pretending. We recognize you. We also support you.
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