Finding Calm in the Push and Pull: Handling Mom Guilt as a Working Mother

And if you spend the entire day with your children?

You are not making enough effort to "keep up," grow, or contribute.

It wears you out.

It is not fair.

And now is the moment to discuss it.

Is Mom Actually Guilty?

The devious voice in your head that says things like, "You missed bedtime again—bad mom," is known as mom guilt.

"It is selfish of you to work late while someone else prepares your child's snack."

"You are guilty—you enjoy your job a little too much."

The fact is, though, that you are not acting improperly.

Mom guilt is about expectations, not failure. unrealistic ones. frequently internalized and self-imposed by a society that has yet to grasp the true nature of modern motherhood.

Why Working Mothers Experience It So Strongly

We are frequently asked to perform impossible tasks, let us face it.

Be totally present during work.

At home, be really present.

Stay fit, schedule educational activities, prepare nutritious meals, and maintain your sanity.

Oh—and while you are at it, savor every second.

The emotional toil never stops. And because it never feels like enough, guilt sneaks in even when you are doing everything "right."

What no one tells you enough, though, is that you can love your family and your job. One does not negate the other.

Five Strategies for Handling Mom Guilt Without Going Crazy

1. Rethink what "enough" is.

Sometimes all you need is a hug and some cereal for supper. Supermom does not have to be you every night. Accept the authentic, gorgeously messy motherhood and let go of the Pinterest ideal.

2. Focus on Your Why

You work, but why? Perhaps it is steadiness in finances. It might be your passion. Perhaps it is to demonstrate to your children what ambition looks like. Remember that frequently. Your "why" is important and legitimate.

3. Pay Attention to Where You Are

Trying to multitask is a fiction. Be present with your children. Keep your attention on the task at hand. Being present, one thing at a time, is more important than trying to do everything at once.

4. Discuss It

Even though they may not express it aloud, it is likely that your mom's friends share your sense of guilt. Get the discussion going. Connection is fostered by vulnerability, and it may be immensely restorative.

5. Allow Grace to Enter

You are not failing. Your ability to mother, provide, and show up is a strength, not a weakness. Treat yourself with the same respect that you would a friend.

A Kind Reminder: Feeling guilty does not imply that you are acting improperly.

It demonstrates your concern. Deeply.

It indicates that, despite the difficulties, you are turning up.

It indicates that you are attempting to please everyone, which is a difficult load to bear by yourself.

Mama, this is your permission slip:

to experience guilt without allowing it to define who you are.

To respect your motherhood and your aspirations.

to change the narrative that requires you to make a decision.

since you don't.

You are sufficient.

Now. just like you are.